why do i alwayss think about life??

life is not alwayss living for oneself.something belongs to you depends on others and those others depends upon someone else.where do we and our interests stands then???yeah yeahh ..all in questionss.I am not what i alwayss wanted to and i am forgetting about the fact that i always wanted.That is so why ,everyday i start with ,looking for my very ownself.sometimes i find it right in front of me,sometimes behind,sometimes beside,some times up there flying in the sky,sometimes flowing with water,somtimes moving with air,sometimes black, sometimes white,sometimes wrong and sonetimes right...n when i try to catch it and put it in my very ownself it starts changing ......turning into all stranger to me...n the fear of childhood comes to my mind then which my elders use to teach me...."Don't talk to the strangers"....and i stay away safe from my ownself.......